The gem on my hand..

i'm not really happy nowadays.. kinda mix feeling or something.. it's like.. the daughter you adore so much is now marrying another guy.. oh well.. i know i'm old.. but i never knew is that serious.. anyway.. i think my recently appeared white hair proves that i'm getting older.. and it's not easy for me to grow white hair alright.. coz i'm such a "whatever" person..

and today.. as i was walking restlessly to buy my dinner.. i feel so tired of everything and was looking down on the ground as i was walking.. and this wind blew from my right side.. causing my long fringe to cover my eyes.. then i raise my head and used my finger to.. you know.. "put them aside" or something like that.. sorry my english isn't that good.. but anyway.. then i saw a really gorgeous lady walking in front of me.. i was like.. getting excited and all.. trying to walk faster to see how she looks.. then she came to the road when she was looking for cars whether they are passing by.. so i took the chance and looked at her.. oh well.. then i thought to myself.. "ok la.. at least i didn't turn my head in the instance.." and all of a sudden.. i went back to the moody me before i saw that lady..

that's like so amazing alright.. lol.. but that also tells me that we have to have a goal to work on in order to be happy.. which is probably the reason for why i'm unhappy now.. and this links to my first paragraph too.. i don't know.. life is complicated sometimes.. and i guess i have to find something to do as soon as possible.. and although being alone is tough.. but i guess if i were to not let anyone hurt coz of me.. i better stay alone for now..

sacrifice for the one you wanna sacrifice.. is the happiest thing you can do in the world..